An Unexamined Life…

there’s a life somewhere in there a past tense of life a life lived in albums there was a time when we could just tuck them away. the pictures. forget about them, their colors, their scent, their laughs. just stick them in plastic pages. never look at them again. easy to forget. lies! memories are [...]

Once again. All changes saved. Words we see, we read, and do not think twice about. Saved. The changes were saved. Saved implies assimilated, accepted, approved of. Thought about. Considered and agreed upon. Saved. I can safely close this, as it is saved. There are no more words worth saving. Safely close this. Move on.

if it doesn’t come bursting out of you in spite of everything, don’t do it. unless it comes unasked out of your heart and your mind and your mouth and your gut, don’t do it. if you have to sit for hours staring at your computer screen or hunched over your typewriter searching for words, [...]

These I singing in spring collect for lovers, (For who but I should understand lovers and all their sorrow and joy? And who but I should be the poet of comrades?) Collecting I traverse the garden the world, but soon I pass the gates, Now along the pond-side, now wading in a little, fearing not [...]

C’est surement qu’on se dit que c’est mieux que rien. Qu’on vaut juste ça, et pas plus. Parce que dans des moments comme ça, on se dit, comment mesurer notre valeur autrement qu’avec le regard des autres? Le regard, les égards. Le respect qu’il faut gagner à chaque jour, sans quoi, arriver avec un déficit [...]

Isn’t this what you wanted? Weren’t you on the path to grab the prize, the cup, the fucking Holy Grail of contentment? To slowly swim through hazy mornings and bloom in the bright nights where freedom embraces selective memory. Imbalance only lightened your step  as you covered your wavering with invisible music. Oh but to [...]

C’était le dernier froid. La dernière journée trop emmitouflée. Je laisse les couches tomber, éparses, je les laisse me quitter sans un mot, sans un bruit. Je peux imaginer que l’air soulevé lancerait un cri s’il le pouvait. Que de tremblements dans l’atterissage forcé d’une cape en mal d’héro. Ou d’héroine. Il y aura, puisque [...]

Another one another one another one I can’t Break Unless mine is broken as well Unless mine is Not involved Nothing to recover from But a sweet a warm a loving Moment embrace more never to be The rush of the stumble Has no equal

“Break me” she said.  “Break me, break me. And when it’s done, when it’s all over, you can put the pieces back together however you want to.” But like a jigsaw puzzle, her pieces were meant to only fit one way. “You can make me, invent me, create me. I’ll belong to you and only [...]

I would fly to sail a while and feel the breeze meet my (insert here, please, yes, insert) meet all that stands still and all that can’t let go freshen up for the company say everything that matters everything that rings right and true (can you say alleluia) push the lines push the borders dust [...]

Ok en code en ctrl+x en ctrl+v en components… Make sure, make sure they’re writable. Trois jours moins quelques heures, la dernière marche seul, la dernière ride seule. Et oui la valse des emails des downloads des nudges des soupirs sourirs. Et oui maman est de retour, les draps propres, la vaisselle faite, les lunches. [...]

… And when you loose control, you’ll reap the harvest you have sown. And as the fear grows, the bad blood slows and turns to stone. And it’s too late to lose the weight you used to need to throw around. So have a good drown, as you go down, all alone, Dragged down by [...]

My haves do not always take care of my wants. Some wants I don’t always realize are already haves. Where x is wants and y is haves Identify the value of each variable.

The flesh is weak. nothing’s shocking But easily discarded if one was so determined. if one was so inclined And yet beyond the ugliness lies the truth about us all. fire is the outcome of hypocrisy      

I’m circling something. Closing in. I just have to find what is at the center. Reading back entries I can clearly see how hard I was running from everything. Real and imaginary. How I thought I was going towards something when in fact I was leaving it all behind. The pull I think was actually [...]