A very bad cold, nyquil and PMS do NOT mix well. I don’t think I’ve ever been this confused, depressed, lonely, impatient, sad, psychotic in my life. I feel like I’m the end of my rope. For no fucking reason. If only it had a purpose. If only it inspired me. If only I had the strenght to hold a book or watch a good movie… I managed to make sense of an old CSI episode, fell asleep on the second one (it was actually a Miami and my god David Caruso is such a fucking bad actor). I should go to bed right now, wipe the drool off my lips, put out that cigarette (yes, even if my throat is killing me), turn off the cumputer. Turn off my head. Lights out.
CSI Miami : 5bucks (or whatever you use for money up there) if you can find me a scene where David Caruso is talking in a scene where his head isnt lowered or he isnt being shot from the side.
Very raw.
Great fuel.
This is the kind I use to write fiction, because anything else is too close to home.
spyder: good one 🙂 but you really should catch up on Canadian culture… don’t you know we use mirrors and beaver pelts for currency?
veronica: you’re right, but I’m still new at this, not always recognizing the opportunities. I tend to fold instead. thanks 🙂
Good lord I could do a whole set on beaver pelts but that’s just cause my mind is in the gutter.
Hope you feel better and when you learn how to shut down your mind, let me know because that is always the hardest thing for me. That and realizing and accepting that sometimes there is no point.
stephaine! I didn’t know that about you 😉
the mind… it’s like a windmill, I think we just have to come up with a way of using all that energy instead of battling the wind. well, that’s my theory for now… ask me tomorrow, it might change.
feel better.
life is beautiful, even when it’s lonely…especially then.
people are thinking about you, not that it matters.
-l
thank you, you know you’re right, especially then.
Hi
Your words really speak to me, I can so relate to how you feel. Sometmes the words are just wanting to burst out of me too. And sometimes they are not pretty.
Your site is great.
leigh: words have so much power… yours speak to me too, even at their most cryptic. thank you for the compliment 🙂